Monday, July 20, 2009

Don't Break the Yolk

If you had a favorite human skull, what would you name it?
Skully? Boner? Sugar?
King Diamond named his Melissa.
Melissa apparently was a woman burned at the stake for practicing witchcraft. Several songs written by King Diamond went on to describe how unbearable the loss was, and vow revenge against the priest that burned Melissa.
In a tragic twist of events, Melissa was lost to all of us again when she was stolen after Mercyful Fate played a show in the Netherlands. Oh... The Dutch.
Fortunately, King Diamond saved Melissa's femurs, and was able to attach them to his microphone.

To honor Mercyful Fate, King Diamond, and Melissa, I present to you:

Mercyful Fate: Don't Break the Yolk

Metal Constituents:
  • 1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 3/4 cups sugar
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 4 egg yolks (approximately 3 ounces)
  • 1/4 cup lemon juice
  • 1 teaspoon lemon extract, all natural
  • grated rind from 1 lemon
  • 1 teaspoon bitters
  • 5 egg whites (approximately 5 ounces)
  • 1/4 teaspoon cream of tarter
  • 1/4 cup sugar
For the Meringue Frosting:
  • 4 large egg whites
  • 2/3 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon lemon juice
  • 1 teaspoon finely grated lemon zest
  • Pinch cream of tartar
  • Pinch fine salt

Merciless Instructions:
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F, line a cupcake tin with baking cups and set aside.
  2. Sift flour, sugar, salt, and baking powder into the bowl of a standing mixer.
  3. In a medium bowl, combine oil, egg yolks, lemon juice, lemon extract, lemon rind, and bitters. Stir to combine.
  4. On a low setting, start to beat the dry mixture and slowly add the wet. Increase the mixer speed to medium and beat until incorporated.
  5. Transfer mixture to another bowl. Wash and dry mixer bowl.
  6. Whip egg whites with whisk attachment on medium-high speed until foamy.
  7. With the mixer on medium speed, add cream of tarter and slowly add sugar.
  8. Beat on high speed until stiff peaks form.
  9. Scoop a cupful of the stiff egg whites, and gently fold into the batter. This should lighten up the batter.
  10. Transfer the batter to the rest of the egg whites, and gently fold until there are no more streaks of egg white.
  11. Scoop into cupcake cups about 2/3s full.
  12. Bake for 22-25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.
  13. For Meringue Frosting: Bring a few inches of water to a boil in a saucepan that can hold a mixer's bowl above the water.
  14. Whisk the egg whites, sugar, lemon juice and zest, cream of tarter and salt in the bowl by hand.
  15. Set the bowl above the boiling water and continue whisking until the mixture is hot to the touch and the sugar dissolves, about 1 to 2 minutes.
  16. Transfer the mixture to a standing mixer fitted with the whisk attachment and beat at medium-high speed until meringue is cool and holds a soft peak, about 5 minutes.
  17. Continue beating until it holds stiff peaks.
  18. Top completely cooled cakes with Meringue frosting.
  19. Make Melissa proud.


Price said...

Those silly Dutch. Why can't they leave Mr. Diamond alone.

20. Eat while composing plan to get back at the Dutch.

Vincent said...

Badass. I'm loving the dancing skeleton toy. I'm aware it's not a toy, and that it's a ...thing, but I think of those things as toys.

May I request some cakes? No? Here we go:
Carcass - Pedigree Bakery
Emperor - Anthems to the Bakers at Dusk (needs work)
Behemoth - The AposTASTY (I want an award for that)

Porkloins said...

I'm working on a Carcass cake, and you definitely deserve an award for The Apostasty! Brilliant.

Price said...


Fear Factory - Soul of a New Cupcake

Porkloins said...

Seriously, the 3 of us should go into business together.
Mother Fucking Brutal Bakers - UNITE!!!

Reign in Blonde said...

Hi Kathy! I run a metal blog called 'Reign in Blonde' (two blonde chicks who blog about metal) and I just did a little write-up on you. So stoked about what you're doing! I'm a metal baker, myself. If you're ever in New York, please hit us up!


Rachael Leather said...