Monday, January 25, 2010

(My Favorite) Cakemare

Who doesn't love Metal Church?
People with terrible taste in music, that's who!!!
When I wake up with a Metal Church song in my head, I know it's going to be a good day.
Originally named Shrapnel, Metal Church formed in 1981. They named themselves after an apartment where Metallica and a bunch of other guys would come and go, form bands, and basically worship metal.
Lars Ulrich auditioned to play in Metal Church, but he didn't make the cut. Probably because he's such a douche bag.
Metal Church is a band that will always be awesome. Their self-titled, debut album is a classic. Every song is a triumph.
On a side note, this is the first Metalcake made using my brand new Martha Stewart Kitchen Aid mixer! It is by far the greatest appliance I own.

To honor a band that always puts me in a good mood, I present to you:

Metal Church: (My Favorite) Cakemare

Metal Constituents:
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 1 3/4 cups all purpose flour
  • 3/4 cup Dutch processed cocoa
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 cup whole milk
  • 1/2 cup vegetable oil
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 1 cup boiling water
  • 24 Ghirardelli Chocolate Raspberry Squares, chopped in half diagonally
For the Frosting:
  • 1 stick unsalted butter, room temperature
  • 1 Tablespoon whole milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 3 cups powdered sugar
  • Purple food coloring (or red and blue food coloring)
Merciless Instructions:
  1. Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. Line a cupcake tin with baking cups and set aside.
  2. Stir together sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in the bowl of an electric mixer.
  3. Add eggs, milk, oil and vanilla.
  4. Beat on medium speed for about 2 minutes
  5. Add boiling water (batter will be thin)
  6. Fill baking cups about 2/3 full
  7. Place two halves of a chocolate raspberry square into the center of each cupcake.
  8. Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the middle of one cake comes out clean.
  9. Allow cakes to cool in the pan for 10 minutes, before removing to a wire rack to cool completely.
  10. To make the frosting: Beat the butter with an electric mixer until creamy.
  11. Add milk, vanilla extract, and powdered sugar, beat until fluffy.
  12. Add purple food coloring until desired shade is achieved.
  13. Pipe frosting onto completely cooled cupcakes.
  14. I topped mine with red sugar sprinkles and black edible glitter.
  15. Screeeeeeeeaaaaaam for your cakes!
Here's a live clip of Metal Church playing "Metal Church."
It's oh, so good! Are you ready?


cable_zombie said...

"Who doesn't love Metal Church?
People with terrible taste in music, that's who!!!"

Made me laugh out loud. haha :D

That purple looks damn good.

Porkloins said...

Thanks Hannah!

gordon said...

dude you rock! yet another ass kicking brutal recipe. we need to talk! i need some cakes. and i need some celtic frost.

Matt Von Boozestein said...

These look great. Let the children pray.. for cupcakes!!! I need to go and listen to the Church again.

Any chance for a WASP cupcake? Bake like a beast?

Porkloins said...

Thanks, Matt Von Boozestein!
Perhaps one day I will "Bake like a beast!"